Some of my most fond childhood memories are of sitting out on the back porch, crisscrossed on the old, rotting wood, while watching my dog Apollo frolic about, jumping and nipping at the hundreds of fireflies that would often swarm my backyard in the summer. The warmth from the day heats the earth and keeps it comfortably warm even after the sun has long set.
After a few minutes of simply taking in the sights, my grandma would come out and sit on her white-chipped rocking chair and tell me a story. Some were true stories from when she was a kid, and some were left up to me, leaving me curious about what was true and what wasn’t.
As I’ve grown older, most of these stories have gone from my mind. However, one particular story has stuck with me for my whole life and is the reason I have become such a well-traveled person.
That night she had started her story with a question. A simple one that held a whole lot of weight.
“What gives you the strength to continue when all seems lost?”
Being a young kid I didn’t have much of an answer. If I was asked that now as an adult, I probably would’ve responded with those I love and that has always been there for me during hard times. Nonetheless, she continued, telling me about a mysterious place called The Astral Sea.
What it is has never been agreed upon. Some people say it’s a place, some a phenomenon, a feeling, or simply just not real. My grandmother described it as, “The Astral Sea is a place at the edge of all creation, where the lines are blurred between reality and impossibility.”
However she said for this to be easier for me to understand, she described it more like a lake rather than a sea. It was a strange place that could only be viewed at night on clear, cloudless skies, where the stars shine their brightest and the moon is at its full. The night sky would be reflected upon its waters and, matched with the stillness of the water, appear almost like a giant mirror lying on the ground.
I was told that whenever someone looked into the water, they wouldn’t see their reflection. However, everyone had seen something different. One person said they saw what seemed like an alternate dimension, like it was a portal to the other side while another person said they could see their past emotions and decisions playing out like a movie.
But in the very end, they all would describe the same feeling they had no matter what they saw or experienced; a sense of comfort and hope. Hope that everything will be okay. It was so powerful of a message that those who have struggles in life have reported feeling touched, and cried tears of joy as if it was some comforting family member or other loved one who told them “It would be okay” and they were right.
In the end, The Astral Sea is all of the above. It’s a strange place, yet also a feeling, yet also a fairy tale. It has been decided that it can be everything at the same time yet nothing. But in the end, everyone agrees it is a place to find purpose and comfort if you feel like everything is crumbling down around you.
When I asked my grandmother where I could find it, she explained to me that its location changed every day after the full moon began to wane, and it was virtually impossible to find it as it could be anywhere at any time, and it was a short window to when you could see it.
That was quite a long time ago now. My grandmother passed about six years ago and ever since then, I have never stopped searching for The Astral Sea. Its sparkling waters of stars still allude to me, just barely escaping from my grasp like water slipping through my fingers.
Many of my friends and family have told me to stop chasing fairy tales, and that I should work on actually living my life. But I’ve never felt more like myself when searching for this body of water. I have yet to cease my search and I will never stop.
I tell this story in hopes that other people resonate with it too, and also decide to join in on the search. Perhaps working together we’ll find it easier.
I will give an update when I do find it. I don’t know when, but someday it will come. I hope you are all willing to wait.